TIPS BEFORE YOU READ:
- I'm very critical of work, I am on my own, and others to see the best results. If you are not good at taking crits, dont read...
the story is pretty good
As far as critiques, I can only crit, the actual production and post production..
ok, I'll get the story stuff out of the way first.... Great story, but acting is always important... the paceing is a little fast between him getting to do the job and the end... I would spend more time setting up the job... just abit...
NOW for production!
#1 Actors, the main is good, the others shows that they are trying to stick to the script... they look a little nervous to timing... best way to get around this, get them to say the lines in their own way? I guess!?
#2 Car scene: to show that the car is moving places get a few branches with leaves, and pass them infront of your key light over the car at the speed you want. This will simulate the apearance of movement... just like planes in the sky, if there are no clouds, the planes are staying still....
#3 Great steadycam work! Congrats! what steadycam system you using? Varizoom?
#4 Lighting in some shots could be stronger then fix the exposure in Post...
#5 The sound in the bar, you can hardly hear it.... super cardaloid mic, good for good sound ^_^
#6 the over all look, is a little too clean? not so natural... to what we would see...
If you are able to get this information back to your crew for future use, then this might improve the OVERall quality of your film.
Great film though, I liked it alot. I wish I was the person to produce it for you cause I like the story.
DBXMe2
PS. the kind of look this story seemed it should have was one like in David Cronenberg's film History of Violence
