Red Prince
New member
Isn't that how Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium started (or at least there was a similar scene near the start of the movie)?
Powerful ways to start a story
- Thread starter TobyHung
- Start date
Watson Jackson
New member
I'm gonna have to disagree with you just look at Oscar winning screenplay American Beauty, and it was done with voice over.....
Its a simple matter of taking the cliche and drenching it in subtext.
Waking up
Waking up
I think starting a story when the character wakes up and is getting ready for the day is a chance to tell a lot about that character. Do they even brush their teeth, eat, drink coffee? are they rushed and get up quick and fast or do they start out slow and sluggish? how do they interact with people? are the nice, pleasant or bah humbug. There is a lot that can be said about a person's state of mind and personality by watching how they start the day, not to mention the underlying meanings of waking up. I just thought of one movie that starts with a character waking up. When Hancock is waking up on the park bench. He grabs a bottle of whiskey and takes a drink and starts his day haphazardly fighting crime and making messes.
Waking up
I think starting a story when the character wakes up and is getting ready for the day is a chance to tell a lot about that character. Do they even brush their teeth, eat, drink coffee? are they rushed and get up quick and fast or do they start out slow and sluggish? how do they interact with people? are the nice, pleasant or bah humbug. There is a lot that can be said about a person's state of mind and personality by watching how they start the day, not to mention the underlying meanings of waking up. I just thought of one movie that starts with a character waking up. When Hancock is waking up on the park bench. He grabs a bottle of whiskey and takes a drink and starts his day haphazardly fighting crime and making messes.
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GabrielM
New member
I read somewhere that the most powerful ways to start a film is with someone dying, someone being born, someone leaving, or someone arriving.
That little lesson always stuck with me, although there's no magic way to make it happen. I'm sure you could resort to one of those suggestions and still screw things up.
For me, the best starts must be cinematic and interesting. Don't delay us the story.
That little lesson always stuck with me, although there's no magic way to make it happen. I'm sure you could resort to one of those suggestions and still screw things up.
For me, the best starts must be cinematic and interesting. Don't delay us the story.
GabrielM
New member
To be completely honest, this is a common faux pas by student filmmakers. Waking up is boring. I understand how it could be insightful on a character's personality and demeanor, but in this ever-growing audiovisual world with films being made right and left, the best strategy for any filmmaker is to hook us with some visceral plot points.
There are indeed ways to make a character waking up interesting, but I assure you most filmmakers will fail. As for me, if I had the budget for it, I would wake up my main character with a meteor piercing through the roof and smashing the strident alarm clock. How's that for a wake up call?
Plus, since films employ too many ellipses, just because we cut from one's bedroom to one's workplace that doesn't necessarily mean that they didn't brush their teeth or didn't drink coffee. And why is this important? Brushing teeth? (Although I do it four, five times a day.) Detail like this could be essential as a character trait for some specific stories, but often it will be listed as minutia.
I'm a subscriber of the Writer's Digest, and I remember a few months back when one of the editors was ranting about how many manuscripts started with a character waking up as well. It seems that both filmmakers and novelists have overused this.
Does this make sense?
There are indeed ways to make a character waking up interesting, but I assure you most filmmakers will fail. As for me, if I had the budget for it, I would wake up my main character with a meteor piercing through the roof and smashing the strident alarm clock. How's that for a wake up call?
Plus, since films employ too many ellipses, just because we cut from one's bedroom to one's workplace that doesn't necessarily mean that they didn't brush their teeth or didn't drink coffee. And why is this important? Brushing teeth? (Although I do it four, five times a day.) Detail like this could be essential as a character trait for some specific stories, but often it will be listed as minutia.
I'm a subscriber of the Writer's Digest, and I remember a few months back when one of the editors was ranting about how many manuscripts started with a character waking up as well. It seems that both filmmakers and novelists have overused this.
Does this make sense?
Frances Beckham
New member
never start a story with the following:
a dream
Flashback
sex scene
These are instant turnoffs for producers
a dream
Flashback
sex scene
These are instant turnoffs for producers
abrahamgottick
New member
Let us appreciate the authors who sought out the comfort of often the most interesting and most interesting videos years arise from such little-known books. I gather the team to draft a new film. Please report your suggestions to write on the forums
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Frances Beckham
New member
the best way to start a script would be to jump right into the plot. begin with an event that is relevant to the story. it has to be an event that is compelling and get the story going. it must hook the reader.
garychencool
New member
I would agree that the intro is very important since screenplay readers will only read like the first few pages (I think it's up to 10 pages) which is 10 minutes of actual screen time. If nothing is really happenning, they will probably put it down. Some read 30 pages.
geckopelli
Member
Read v. Shot
Read v. Shot
Spec scripts must obey all the rules. However, shooting scripts rarely do.
That's the difference.
Some 20 year-old NON-FILM student reads the spec first; I know-- my daughter read for Morgan Creek in '07-'08. She passed on many.
ACTION and/or intrigue on the first page or you're lost.
And Pro readers read the WHOLE script, no matter how much it sucks, looking for that one element worth something.
If you direct in the script-- forget it. If it's full of description, forget it.
readers often read only dialogue. UNLESS the dialogue grabs them, they'll never read the action descriptions at all.
Keep it to less that 100 pages-- that's the first thing they check. How long. The director will expand it, anyway-- with your input (unless you suck).
Lose "we see" or "the camera sees". NO "we" or "you". When you describe the scene, be brisk, forget grammar. "A boat on a stormy sea", NOT, The waves crash into etc.
Use words, not sentences when possible:
"She sneaks into the shot", not "she walks quietly, undetected by the others."
Of course, all this only applies if you're dealing with the studios or well-established professional production companies.
And forget Haugue.
---
And if you'll excuse me for bragging--
I sold my first film a couple weeks ago. Paid and everything! Extensive re-writing is involved.
Shooting in the desert this winter.
Read v. Shot
Spec scripts must obey all the rules. However, shooting scripts rarely do.
That's the difference.
Some 20 year-old NON-FILM student reads the spec first; I know-- my daughter read for Morgan Creek in '07-'08. She passed on many.
ACTION and/or intrigue on the first page or you're lost.
And Pro readers read the WHOLE script, no matter how much it sucks, looking for that one element worth something.
If you direct in the script-- forget it. If it's full of description, forget it.
readers often read only dialogue. UNLESS the dialogue grabs them, they'll never read the action descriptions at all.
Keep it to less that 100 pages-- that's the first thing they check. How long. The director will expand it, anyway-- with your input (unless you suck).
Lose "we see" or "the camera sees". NO "we" or "you". When you describe the scene, be brisk, forget grammar. "A boat on a stormy sea", NOT, The waves crash into etc.
Use words, not sentences when possible:
"She sneaks into the shot", not "she walks quietly, undetected by the others."
Of course, all this only applies if you're dealing with the studios or well-established professional production companies.
And forget Haugue.
---
And if you'll excuse me for bragging--
I sold my first film a couple weeks ago. Paid and everything! Extensive re-writing is involved.
Shooting in the desert this winter.
geckopelli
Member
First question: Give this guy some life. Does he nervously try but fail to light a cigarette several time before reading the note? (or after reading the note?). Also, Foreshadow the threat-- tease me.
Second question: Do you? you seem to have some doubt about whether or not they are FB's (?). Try to find another way REALLY HARD. If you can't, the scenes are needed.
geckopelli
Member
However, Pulp Fiction was NOT Tarantino's first money for writing deal. He had previously proven himself, and was connected.
Unconventional won't cut it for your first sale.
geckopelli
Member
The spec version and the shooting version of American Beauty are quite different.
For one thing, he does the girl in the spec.
geckopelli
Member
No, sort of -- not until next year.
I've done some unaccredited re-write work (inappropriate to disclose). I'm very good with dialogue and adding individuality (quirkiness, really) to characters. I also have an eye for detail-- no inconsistency escapes me.
I recently sold rights to a screenplay about an amnesiac on a treasure hunt in the desert (working title is "Lost and Found") for Cash and a Piece of the Action. So I'm a producer now, too. I'm chasing Casey Sander and Robert Beltran for supporting roles (friends of the family).
And when the re-write is finished, the screenplay is going into James Franco's hands (Professional and personal Friends in common my daughter. See webisodes Vanya Show (sp?)), so keep you fingers crossed for me.
I live in the basement of Oscar Winning Producer of Note Jana Sue Memel's house (2 wins for shorts, 20 of her films have been nominated) who has mentored me based on raw talent ($200 an hour for everybody else), My kids are a rising theater tech and lighting designer and a voice over audition booth director for SBV, so you can see I'm fairly well connected. I telling you all this not to brag (well, maybe a little!), but because that's how it's done around here. It's who you know.
I'm also on the edge of TV-- I received a settlement in the TV Writer's Age Discrimination suit last year (they contacted me based on submissions) and I've worked on a charity project with Gloria Calderon Kellett (Rules of Engagement, How I Met Your Mother), and am about to do so with another CBS sitcom writer who's name I can't seem to remember (that's gonna bite me in the ass).
But the coolest thing that's happened since I came to Hollywood was the night I drank Kiefer Sutherland under the table on his dime! Awesome.
Chase your dreams people-- they're waiting for you to catch up!
See you at the movies!
garychencool
New member
generally, a nice way to start is with suspense, let's say a hitman shooting the target, it can have this short chase scene and the target is cornered or something, do some suspenseful moments but here's the thing, show the viewers everything but the targets face, here, you have no idea who it is. Except for the gender, this creates long term suspense throughout the film because the viewer will always be thinking, who is the target? And during the film, the original target is someone important, but at the end, it's someone else, a main character or someone important to the hitman. There, the viewer did not see that coming, at all.
Also, first impressions. You don't want to do an intro on WWI if it has NOTHING to do with the rest of the film.
Also, first impressions. You don't want to do an intro on WWI if it has NOTHING to do with the rest of the film.
it might be fun to start with something
it might be fun to start with something
it might be fun to start with something that has nothing to do with the rest of the film. match it up in some way but like starting a story with... the President of the United States is on vacation in Hawaii , the space shuttle landed safely and today I got my drivers lic.
it might be fun to start with something
it might be fun to start with something that has nothing to do with the rest of the film. match it up in some way but like starting a story with... the President of the United States is on vacation in Hawaii , the space shuttle landed safely and today I got my drivers lic.
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Frances Beckham
New member
Good Start
Good Start
Hay. That line is a good one sentence logline. It give the reader of something strange and eerie.
Frances Beckham
Good Start
Hay. That line is a good one sentence logline. It give the reader of something strange and eerie.
Frances Beckham
How about this - It is a dark cold winter day in war-torn New York City. The wind gusting up and blowing the snow and debris from the piles of garbage and trash in the grey streets. A young boy about 8 or 9 in tattered clothing is standing in the abandon avenue screaming "momma! momma!" Next to him is a young woman's body slumped over with thin dirty fingers slightly curled in a claw-like frozen gesture reaching towards the grey sky. With the strong sound of the rushing wind in our ears, we hear dogs howling in the distance. and, the little boy cry's out again Momma!
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