My new comedy idea

[Yldii]

The Accidental Monk.


This is the story of Thomas, an accident prone monk who is sent out of the monastery and into the world. He thinks his mission is to find the true meaning of life. The reality is that he was sent away to rid his fellow monks of his bungling antics. In the course of his travels He meets up with our heroen and by accident, uncovers her royal birthright as the last blood heir of a dying monarch. Together they defeat an evil tyrant who stands in the way of her throne, win her the hearts of the people and the love of a swashbuckling hero. And all of this caused by Thomas' constant screw ups.


Input please.....
.................Yldii..........

 

[jodymichelle]

Hello Yldii Welcome to the forums

Hmm,... I'm not sure yet what my comments are but could you post more information about the main characters and setting? What kind of monk is Thomas? Why do you want Thomas to be a monk?

 

[jodymichelle]

Dang, I sounded kind of serious in that last post. Yldii, that's a really interesting set up. I'm still curious about what kind of monk he is, but it sounds like a really good idea.

 

[Yldii]

Thanks for the welcome and the input.
Well I want the setting to be medieval Britainesque without actually saying England.

As for Thomas, He is a pudgy friar who loves life. His desire to help all in need and his belief that everyone has some good inside is at the core of his being. Thomas is an optimist who despite His continuous bungling, believes that all things happen for a reason and that it all works out in the end.

The girl (No name yet) is a young firey redhead who has raised herself from the age of twelve when her mother died. Her father was a prince who was never spoken of but the locket she keeps holds the secret of his identity. She falls for Darius Tanner the leader of the underground resistance movement she seek to join.

Darius is a hero and champion of the people. He and his band of rebels fight for those who can't fight for themselves. He is a young swashbuckler who sailed the seas as a defender of the crown. Darius returned to a home unlike the one he left. His king lay dying while the people live under the thumb of the evil tyrant Maddigan Thorn. That day he vowed to restore peace and dignity to all.

Maddigan Thorn is a ruthless man who has seized power by poisoning his king after methodically eliminating all known heirs and destroying what he thought was the only copy of a document identifying the one unknown heir.

.........Yldii............

 

[jodymichelle]

That's interesting. We do need a thumbs up emoticon. Happy writing

 

[Yldii]

FADE IN:



               EXT. 16TH CENTURY CATHEDRAL, ENGLAND - MORNING

               A bell sounds in the distance and grows louder as we sweep
               across the medieval English countryside toward the
               brilliantly adorned cathedral on the hill.   

               SUPER:

               Westshier Abby  

               Crowds of parishioners gather in front of the Abby while more
               make the trek up the road from the village below.  Monks
               scurry to the Abby from the huge open gates of the monastery
               next-door.  



               INT. MONASTERY CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS

               WILLIAM, a young monk, stands in the dimly lit corridor
               facing an open door. 

                                   WILLIAM
                         Brother Thomas, were going to be
                         late for the ceremony.

               THOMAS, the pudgy bright eyed monk, emerges from the open
               door joining William in the corridor.

                                   THOMAS
                             (Calmly)
                         Patience brother.

               William links arms with Thomas and hurries along the hallway
               with Thomas in tow.

                                   WILLIAM
                         Patients may be a virtue my friend,
                         but if you mess up the bishop's
                         arrival ceremony the Abbott will
                         have your head. 



               EXT. MONASTERY COURTYARD - CONTINUOUS

               From above the courtyard we see William and Thomas exit the
               monastery and head for the gates.  Thomas is still tieing the
               sash of his robe as William brushes the lint from Thomas'
               shoulder.



               EXT. WESTSHIER ABBY - CONTINUOUS

               The ABBOTT stands with several monks in front of the
               Cathedral greeting parishioners as they enter.  A lavish
               coach approaches. 

                                   ABBOTT
                         The bishop arrives my brothers so
                         show some reverence.

               The coach pulls up and The BISHOP emerges from it.  The monks
               stand  with there heads bowed in respect.

                                   ABBOTT
                         Ah, your eminence.  It's a pleasure
                         to see you again.

               The Bishop extends his hand and the Abbott bows and kisses
               his ring.

                                   BISHOP
                         The pleasure is mine good Abbott.

                                   ABBOTT
                         Your to kind old friend.

               The Abbott and his monks escort the Bishop through the crowd
               of bowing onlookers.

                                   ABBOTT
                         We've prepared a ceremony for your
                         arrival.

                                   BISHOP
                         How very nice.

               They make there way through the crowd and into the Abby.

 

[shozbot]

clutsy monk

clutsy monk

Yldii,

I really like your idea. You've set up a good template for both conflict and comedy. The character relationship sounds both antagonisitic (potentially) and sympathetic. What you convey seems to indicate a character driven situation. The more you develop that aspect the more the reader will invest in the outcome of your story. I would say your research would be to really, really know the backstory of your two main characters so that as you bring them together they are full of equally diverse motives and behaviors that feed the conflict (and the screw ups) so that your plot points are organic rather than mechanical. I think you have a great start to a funny story. Good luck.

 

[Nietzsche]

what type of comedy is this going to be?

slapstick (like having chris farley type character)
dark (because its set in the middle ages)
romance comedy (please no, jk)

i am curious

 

[The Company]

This monk character reminds me a little of Chris Farley in Beverly Hills Ninja.
Sounds good, keep at it.

 

[jodymichelle]

it reminded me of that also :lol:

 

[trahald10]

Sounds very interesting.