Sorry if I sound like I am over explaining it. I was just trying to lay it all out to make sure. I didn't mean to write police woman. I don't know why I wrote it. I mean to write lonely, instead of ownly as well. Sorry. I actually broke up with my gf, and was distracted and upset, and couldn't write the best explanation. Sorry about that.
I was thinking that the character should be in her 30s. Mainly I am an aspiring filmmaker trying to break into the business, and I do write a lot of my own scripts to make. Most of the actors I know are in their 30s and I was going to use them again most likely. So I intended her to be in her 30s, as I already have an actress lined up, who is in her late thirties, going on 40. But if she should be younger, than maybe I can go for somebody else. I just like to work with the talent I have.
I was told before though, that it would be more convincing if she were older than 25 though, cause if she is going to snap to the point of raping men, it should be a build up of rejections over the years, and not just a few when she is young. So is that true?
Basically the men she hates are ones like the cop who rescued her, who seem to get any woman they want and have big bright family futures because of it. She even becomes to label him in that category also, when she wants to take the cop out on a date to thank him for rescuing her, and he rejects her of course.
I can come up with a backstory for her, which I am still working on. Mainly I came up with a lot of the immediate plot first, in order to get to the rape and how should would get away with it. The plot with the gang and the new recruit also comes into play later, as part of the MC's revenge plan, and the consequences as to how it goes wrong. So I came up with a lot of the plot driven elements first. I knew what she was doing and how, and I just haven't fully come up with the 'why' yet and her background.
Also, even though the first half of my script is mostly antagonist driven by her, the story is told from the protagonist's POV. So the protagonist does not know who she really is, does not know that the blood in was fake, or that it was a blood in, as oppose to just a kidnapping, and does not know that she is using her being in danger as a kidnap victim as an excuse to lure the cop into a trap to rape him.
So since it's told from the MC's POV for the first half, the reader or audience, does not her past at all at this point, and does not know she is one of the gang members. I wanted to tell it from the MC's POV in order for the audience to be surprised, when he is surprised and not knowing more than what he knows. So is this bad, as it will cause confusion? Can I get the audience to say to themselves, "I don't know why this character is doing what she is doing or the gang, but that's okay, cause I will find out later"?
Plus since it's told from the MC's point of view, she is not going to tell the MC all about her and tell him which rejection was her final straw, cause she doesn't need to give the MC any information on her, more than he needs to know, since he is a cop. So I thought maybe her background should remain a mystery but in a good way. I mean in The Silence of the Lambs for example you don't really know Hannibal Lecter's past or why he does what he does, or what set him off. You find out later in the prequels but when the movie came out, at that time, audiences accepted an evil villain with a mystery unknown background. Can I do the same here?
And yes there are actually videos kept which the cop uses later to get an arrest warrant, as part of his revenge plan to set her up, as well as the other gang members. I'd say she has killed a few, maybe over 10 by this point. The police know about her past crimes from other incidents reported in the past. As for how she charms men, I am thinking she is lacking in charm skills, which is why she has to lure the MC by making him think she is in danger by the one group of people who may have motive to keep her quiet, the gang who kidnapped her before, or so the cop thinks. But the MC also has a faithful girlfriend he is devoted to as well, and is not going to stray.
But I have to work on what she is doing to drive men away as well. I just have the plot driven part of the story down more, as to how the MC is tricked, and how it came to be so far.
I will go over the points you made:
1. Woman poses as fake hostage so her gang can conduct a blood in on a new recruit. Nobody in her gang likes her either? She must have some pretty serious issues.
2. The MC discovers the blood in and stops it, rescuing the woman thinking she is a real hostage. So, he just happened upon it? If he works in the gang unit, he would likely know some of these guys - and maybe even her. Since you say some of the clothes were recognized, there must be some kind of familiarity, no? Wouldn't the gang members know him as well?
3. The MC arrests another man in the process. The rest got away, the woman plays victim. These gangs are pretty organized, and likely have some protocol when it comes to arrests and giving information. This feels like she has no experience, or did not go through any initiation herself. Gang chicks get a blood-in as well. She didn't?
4. The woman doesn't want to give up the names of the gang members who have escaped so she pretends to be scared kidnap victim who doesn't want to testify or cooperate in hopes that the suspect will go free without her cooperation. Cops in the gang unit would likely be suspicious. Just saying. I get the gang would make her look different - innocent like, but this would not be a new scenario for the cops. They would know about this kind of iniciation, and be wary of her, watching for even the smallest clue. Also, wouldn't new gang members know of it? It's hardly a secret.
5. She sets her sights on raping the MC as her next target, so she pretends to the in danger from the gang, making the MC think that she needs protection cause the gang is after her, not wanting her to testify. Why does she set his sights on him? Did he also reject her?
6. The MC protects her the night she stages an attempt from the gang on herself, to make him think she is in danger. Okay, so the gang knows she is the serial killer? Why would the gang agree to help her? Or did she just make it up, and there is no gang that comes to her house? It isn't clear.
7. As he goes to protect her for the night, she traps him and rapes him and it was all a trick. Again, what is her reason?
1. I was thinking they would just ask her to volunteer nicely, or she could volunteer the idea herself, so the gang does not have to risk using a real hostage. Maybe she could volunteer herself, and just tell the gang to make sure that the new recruit doesn't harm me, and make the gun is loaded with real live rounds.
2. Basically what happens is, is on patrol and sees two of the gang members search a man for a wire and weapons, in a secluded area, where they met the man. The then all get in a car a drive off. The MC thinks they might be up to something criminal by seeing the search from a couple of hundred feet away, and he decides to discretely follow them in his unmarked car, and see what they do. From here, he stumbles upon the blood in, while observing them. But does not know who any of the gang members are. I wanted it this way, cause if he doesn't know any of them it adds more mystery for him to find out later.
3. You say she it looks like she got no experience herself. Well she would have gotten a blood in way before. Why? Why does she seem like she has no experience? Cause she plays the victim? She just does that temporarily and acts traumatized so she doesn't have to talk to the police right away, until she finds out what is really going on and why a cop turned out to be there.
4. The cops may be suspicious but since she sets her sights on the MC to rape him, her goal is to convince him she is in danger in order to get him to protect him and lure him into trap. So she just has to sell it enough I guess. You say cops are use to kidnap victims turning out to be in collusion with the kidnappers if they will not talk. I talked to cops in my research though and they said that they have never come across an incident where the victim was in collusion, and a lot of times victims in real life, will not talk.
5. She originally needs a reason to spend some time with the MC. She cannot ask him out, cause cops do not go on dates with witnesses in cases. It's against protocol. So she uses the kidnapping case itself, as a means to spend time with him, by making him think she may be in danger and all that, to get him closer. He rejects her when she becomes seductive, and then she lures him into a trap and rapes him, if that makes sense.
6. She makes it all up and stages a break in at her house to get the MC to come and investigate in order to lure him in. However, the gang is also watching her place, cause they think it is suspicious that she is pretending to be in danger and suspicious that she hasn't tried to do anything to get the one suspect off yet. So the gang is surveying her, and sees that she is trying to seduce a cop, and sees that she is trying to get him to watch her place. So they see this and get suspicious as well. The gang knows she has raped before, and are okay with it, and she covers up the evidence in the past, and it's all good with them. But they do not approve of her raping one of the investigating officers of course.
7. Her reason is is that she targets men like him who can get whatever women they want and reject her.
Does this help explains things at all?
As far as reading the points on the idiot plot, I understand what it means, and know the concept. But what character in my story is an idiot, or is every character? It seems to me the biggest idiot has to be the prosecutor cause he lets the case get out of hand to a degree, but is it okay to have one idiot only? Or are the protagonist and antagonist idiots as well?